Sunday Confessions: 6-29-25

"Sometimes I buy bags of croutons and I eat them like chips."

Welcome to Sunday Confessions. Each Sunday through Sunday Scaries Instagram stories, readers submit their totally-anonymous confessions. Because sometime it just feels good to get off your chest.

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The second I had the opportunity last night, I got in bed, shut my eyes, and went to sleep. Normally I’d be watching something to extend the weekend, but I just kind of… gave up. And it felt pretty damn good to wake up this morning with nine-plus hours of sleep under my belt.

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My husband doesn’t know that I have a tattoo written in my toxic ex’s handwriting.

Hate my job so i keep telling customers to leave bad google reviews mentioning me by name to try and get fired.

I received a dick pic while I was at church, and I couldn’t help but look at it right away.

Reading smutty books has actually made me confident to ask for what I want in the bedroom. Now I orgasm every time.

I crave you and what we had last summer.

My husband put us seriously into debt without my knowledge (separate credit cards/accounts) and I feel so betrayed. And stupid.

I am officially the last single person in my friend group and it feels like they all view my dating woes as pure entertainment for them and not actually painful for me.

I do not give a flying fuck about Jeff Bezos and his plastic wife.

Can’t kick the fantasy of hooking up with an older man. Someone who wears a crisp button down shirt with expensive cologne and salt and pepper hair.

My doctor prescribed Prozac last Monday and it’s the first glimmer of hope I’ve had in 10 months.

Getting high and then doing yoga in the nude in your living room is the move. I’ve never felt so carefree.

My bidet makes me want to try anal.

Yesterday I had cereal for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. I’m 37.

I’ve started sneaking groceries into my bags without scanning them at the self checkout as a little act of rebellion against this awful cluster of an economy we’re suffering through. I feel zero guilt about it, and will continue to do so until maybe one day when our salaries finally keep up with inflation.

Please stop talking about your MBA 10 years ago. We’re just trying to get our work done.

Side parted my hair for the first time in a few years. Someone said I was pulling off the retro vibe. Asked me my age, and when I told them, all they said was “no wonder.” I’m 32.

Do girls trips never not end up in tears?

I slept with two smoking hot men in less than 24 hours. I’m a 50-year-old divorcee. There is life after divorce, ladies.

LOVE having my mouth spat in during sex.

I drive over the same pothole everyday on my way home from work just to feel something.

Had to EMAIL the bar where I lost my card because they don’t have a real phone number.

I am honestly not fazed by finding hair in my food. Will just pull it out and keep eating.

I think I’m dating someone who's never washed their sheets. I'm with them when they do their laundry and I see towels washed occasionally- but never sheets. I never sleep at their place.

Old people talk too much I can’t stand it.

Got to my spray tan appointment and realized I had a very obvious bite mark bruise on my ass.

Every time my boyfriend gets drunk and I have to pick him up and take care of him I steal $20 from his cash stash. Call it a “shipping and handling fee.”

Plus size influencers losing weight without acknowledging it bothers me. Like, good for you but I followed you cuz we were the same size so maybe share tips?

Our CEO said on a full company call how I do everything with a smile, yeah because I work from home and can use my vibrator between meetings.

I judge people who are obsessed with this labubu craze! Like what is the reason?

I’ve been pretending to like sourdough bread, especially to all my friends who got into baking their own, but I think it’s so overrated.

Severance pay, unemployment checks, and a trust fund. I should be thrilled for my fully funded summer vacation and then some but I’m bored out of my mind and want a new job.

I don’t know how to clean my shower. I’ll spray some bleach on it every once in a while but I would love it if someone showed me exactly what to do.

Always thought “money doesn’t buy happiness” was bullshit until I realized that once you actually do have money, you just look like an ATM to everyone.

Convinced my friends to take a trip with me to a city where I have a hookup buddy under the guise of a “girls trip.” I don’t feel bad.

Made out with a girl in a club early in the week. Did an IG search only to find out she’s a pro athlete. Now my brain won’t stop replaying that night.

I finally bought a stupid $50 40-oz tumbler and I get it now. I feel so hot girl carrying it I can’t help it.

My showerhead gave me the best O of my life this week.

Pretty sure I need to breakup with my boyfriend but I don’t want to see another girl reap the rewards of the work I put in.

It scares me how alarmingly good I think I'd be on a game like Traitors or Survivor.

Sometimes I buy bags of croutons and I eat them like chips.

I finally took the Christmas decorations down in our house on Friday.

As much as I hate the attention, coverage, controversy, etc. around the Bezos/Sanchez wedding, I have to admit, I bet the wedding weekend welcome bags were unbelievable.

passed out in the same bed as my friends brother. kinda sad nothing happened.

Got so drunk I peed on my friends’ floor in the middle of the night. They blamed their puppy. I didn’t correct them.

I’m dating a cop but I’m liberal and it feels wrong.

My company shuts down over 4th of July so I have this week off. But I have deliverables due next Monday. So I have a week of Sunday scaries until I finish that work.

I ate sour stripes blue razz lemonade for dinner several nights this week. I have no tongue skin.

I’m spiraling. I’ve eaten an entire charcuterie board meant for 3, watched 5 episodes of a show I don’t even like, and now I’m lying in bed questioning why I’m still up and my life choices.

Smashed my face on the sidewalk this weekend. I fly to Italy tonight. I can’t close my mouth or chew properly and talk with a lisp because my front tooth shifted.

The singles trying to mingle are ruining my run club.

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