Sunday Confessions: 6-2-24

"Just have to say it, audiobooks don’t count as reading the book."

I have a working theory that there are two kinds of numbers outside of evens and odds. These numbers are “round” and “sharp,” and while it is very similar to evens and odds, there are still differences.

Of course, rounds would be evens and sharps would be odds. While 2 and 4 are round numbers, 6 is even rounder. 8? It’s the roundest, obviously. 10 is round, but not as round as 12 because 12 divides into two 6s which are (clearly) round. The roundest number of them all under 100? 88 — I mean, just think about how it divides into a bunch of round minion numbers.

Does any of this make sense? I kind of care, but I don’t really care. More than anything, I just wanted to get last night’s pillow thoughts out of my head.

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My best friend and I are both interning for two different companies and both of our mentors have girlfriends and are actively flirting with us. It’s like we’re living in parallel universes and we’re both entertaining it but don’t know if we are being bad people.

I don’t think any of my friendships are good anymore.

Went out this weekend with a guy from my work. Think he’ll be my consistent summer hook up. Risky but worth it.

I have a life that looks so great from the outside and makes for a great Instagram real. Good friends group. New career I enjoy. Relationship for over three years. But it all feels so empty. And almost daily I debate just following my heart, letting it all go and just starting over.

I bought a bathing suit final sale and am coming to the realization I needed to buy a larger size. Currently hyper aware I might accidentally flash fellow patrons at the family pool.

I’d buy a scaries crew neck sweatshirt if it was for sale.

I go through my partners phone all the time. I trust him 100% and know he’d never cheat. I just like reading his texts with his friends and family.

I am absolutely terrified of the cicadas that are currently invading Illinois. I only leave my condo if absolutely necessary. I cannot wait for the next few weeks to be over and they’re all gone. Yes I know they can’t hurt me. No that doesn’t help my situation.

Just have to say it, audiobooks don’t count as reading the book. You can multitask with an audiobook but a physical one requires your undivided attention and much more mental effort.

Everyone won’t shut up about “fun Summer activities” and I can’t wait for cool weather again. You’re telling me sweat, pee filled pools and bugs are better than sweaters, blankets and hot chocolate? Absolutely not.

Kissed four men in 48 hours. Two of them work with me.

My husband has a great group of friends. All friends from high school that live in the same city and are constantly messaging each other in their group chat. The wives/girlfriends of his friends are a whole different story. I can’t really relate to any of them except 2 and it bugs me because friend hangouts are just awkward. Why is making friends as an adult with kids so difficult?!

Used the HR database to determine if an employee I find attractive is single or married. He’s single. Debating on trying to pursue or not. Probably shouldn’t since I’m HR.

I turn thirty this year and I’ve never felt further from the life I want.

I secretly hope that my boyfriend’s business is going to work out, he ends up making a stack of money and I just get to be a pretty, stay home mom.

On an all expenses paid family vacation for a week and I can’t help but find everyone annoying. It’s been 24 hours.

My boyfriend is on a guys’ trip in Europe. I found out the morning after he left that I’m pregnant and I’m not telling him until he gets home in a week.

I’m just really happy. And I feel like I can’t really brag about it. But yeah. Even with all the shitty things happening… at the end of the day, I’m really happy.

I walked out of my job yesterday with no backup plan and I am torn between immense relief of never setting foot in there again and abject terror at what the immediate future looks like.

Just binged the first season of Bridgerton in one sitting.

I never knew her, but can’t stop thinking about her and our friend’s loss. Please check in with each other. Remind people how much loved they are.

At a party and saw my BFF holding her infant cousin. I drunkenly muttered "ugh, I don't want her to have a baby. I don't want to lose her." (Our friend totally heard me and pretty sure she judged.) It's true though. I don't have kids and I hate the thought of being the only friend forging ahead without them.

Got a little drunk last night, texted one of my guy friends who was very sober until 2AM. I’m slightly embarrassed but also surprised he stayed up that long, not sure if it was out of pity/entertainment or if he’s into me?

I lost 50 pounds on semaglutide and feel the hottest I’ve ever felt!!!

I'm the planner in my relationship, which is normally fine with me. However, I feel that my boyfriend is depending too much on me to figure out what we're doing for engagement ring/proposal/elopement, and I want to just be able to have him take the reigns on this.

I am realizing after over a full week off that no amount of time will ever be enough to be off of my current job.

Sometimes I use my hair as floss when there isn’t any readily available. It’s actually really effective!

My husband took a golf trip for five days and I’m home with our three year old son. I love him, but I also might punch him in the face when he gets home.

Turning 30 next month and am very content with still being single, childless, and reevaluating friendships (mutual ghosted my male friend) . I genuinely believe I will THRIVE in my 30s, including my happily ever after. Just me and my delulu until it comes true true.

I start a new job tomorrow and I’m worried that I oversold my skills during the interviews. Hopefully it’s just imposter’s syndrome?

I want to use my 401(k) to pay off credit card debt for good. I'm afraid of bringing it up with my financial advisor bc I don't want to feel judged.

fucked my best friend’s brother this weekend when we were all together away on a trip

This is so not a girls girl move but I want to try to find a way to break up my kids dad with his new gf. She’s awful. Made life a living nightmare.

Going to a solo omakase tonight as a second birthday celebration because I have just as much fun alone.

I haven’t filed my taxes.

I can't stop flirting with my co-worker even though I'm married. It's the only enjoyable thing about my job right now.

These confessions give me more anxiety than the actual sunday scaries—especially the alarming amount of cheating ones. Are there really this many married couples cheating on each other IRL?

Feel like I’m in a constant state of “please still be my friend” with my best friend since she got married and I’m getting a little tired of never knowing where we stand.

Thinking about the guy from high school I recently reconnected with and can’t get off my mind.

I found an engagement ring in my boyfriend’s gym bag and I’m stressed out because I hate the ring.

I told my colleagues “if you need me, too bad” before I left on vacation and we all had a good laugh about it, but they will soon realize I wasn’t joking.

I’m 35 and don’t know how to make new friends.

Sneezed on Thursday Afternoon, became sick on the Friday, Saturday and Sunday in bed and now feeling half better of the Monday. What a great long weekend!

Had to think a little too hard last night to be sure I said the right name in bed.

Have had a wee crush on a client’s son, found their Instagram account, drunkenly followed him and they haven’t followed me back.

I’ve listened to Margaritaville everyday on my way to work since the start of 2024.

Learned my boss is undercutting my raise while trying to play besties. Malicious compliance time.

Everyone, please have a great Monday.

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