Sunday Confessions: 3-31-24

"I have fallen for Martha Stewart and her houseplant vibe."

Image via JHS

This week, I made a change. This isn’t a big change in my routine, but rather a change to help make this column a little more palatable for Monday mornings.

My confession this week? I didn’t include as many “I’m sleeping with my boss” or “I hate my partner” as much as I normally do. Because honestly, a lot of you need to stop sleeping with your boss (and I know I didn’t need to tell you that).

A confession about Sunday Confessions? How meta.

This week’s confessions.

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I hate how every holiday has to be so over the top. Why can’t it be simple?

Looking at another week of being slut shamed at work because I’m the only female attorney.

I wish I had a family with enjoyable Easter traditions. Instead I’m bored and constantly checking my phone in between meals to stalk my situationship.

All I want to do is distance myself from everyone, sit on a couch, smoke and cry my feelings out.

I held back a bag of Easter candy from my girls… because it’s my favorite.

The guy I’ve been seeing politely called things off yesterday. I played it cool but I am devastated.

I have fallen for Martha Stewart and her houseplant vibe.

Best friend of 15 years eloped, had her 24-year-old coworker she’s known 7 months act as her witness/attendant even though I was there. Oh and she forgot to include me in her guest count at the courthouse. Starting to feel like this friendship is over?

My friend from college asked me to be her MoH and plan her bachelorette. No guidance despite repeated questions, ‘just surprise me’. I dislike all of her friends, am starting to resent my friend and can’t wait until the wedding is over so I never have to speak to them again.

Currently boarding a cruise with family and hoping that I don’t have to mediate a drunk family fight in our tiny cabin off the coast of Belize.

I quit a toxic job that was making me have a mental health crisis and have been unemployed for 6 months. I just got a fantastic offer at a company with a much better work environment but I’m so scared I’ll fuck it up that I don’t even want to do it even though I really need a job.

If my future MIL is involved in my ring at all, I’m going to fucking hate it and her even more.

I hate that Easter baskets have turned into Junior Christmas baskets. Buying, collating and setting up just to be told it wasn’t what they “wanted.”

I spend the first hour of my work day applying for other jobs at least 3 times a week.

My foot fell asleep while on the toilet. Rolled it when I stood up, and now I’m in a walking boot.

My best friend is so clingy and I'm starting to get tired of her constantly being jealous of my relationship.

Lost my job last week. Deleted a buncha files while I still had access to server.

My husband’s parents are the most bland people I know, they never show affection to each other, and I don’t have a relationship with them. They’ve never made an effort with me, and they’re awkward af to talk to. I’m afraid we’ll turn into them.

I lied about quitting smoking weed.

After a family wedding this weekend, I’m convinced my parent’s siblings are more interested in my life than my own parents.

I'm super stressed about acing an interview on Tuesday so that I can leave my current job with a super condescending, mean-spirited boss who loves to micromanage everything I do and works me to death for barely any pay.

went to my ex-boyfriend's house, he ended up telling me to go die

I moved to a new state 9 months ago alone for work and a fresh start. I still have no solid friend group and it’s becoming depressing.

I don’t know what I want.

I dropped all the chicken for the chicken alfredo on the floor 10 minutes before my dinner guests arrived. 5 second rule, quick rinse, pat it dry. It’s all I had. I served it.

My parents separated when I was an adult and you’d think that’s easier but it’s not. My mom is screwing my dad over for a lot of money and she doesn’t work or try at life. Cutting her off as of Easter Sunday.

I went on a 4th date with a guy last night and when they dropped off the check he handed to me and said “you can pay for this one.” There will not be a 5th date.

Took time off social media for lent and feel like it didn’t help my screen time problem at all.

Spent time with a friend and realized that we have nothing in common anymore. I didn’t know what to talk about and I didn’t have fun. She wants to hang out again next weekend but I don’t.

My coworker got promoted to Director and is now my boss. I love her as a person and coworker but she has poor leadership skills and I can’t stand her as a boss.

I hate the house I just bought with my husband. Can’t tell him. Feel trapped.

I got dumped. But I planned on dumping first. So angry I was beat to the punch.

Got on my flight very drunk last night. Woke up in Istanbul this morning with an entire glass of red wine spilt on my white pants with one flight left to go.

I told my parents that we had to get home after our Easter visit because I had a special meal planned for my kiddos. I just ordered pizza. I had to get out of there.

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