Retail Therapy 011: Goop Cruises & Rage Cops
Gwyneth Paltrow? On a... cruise? No.
Listen to today’s Retail Therapy on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, YouTube (see above), and anywhere else podcasts are found.
There are two types of consumers in the world:
Those who let a sold-out item ruin the rest of their day.
Those who don’t let material items dictate the trajectory of their mood.
Barrett and I, unfortunately, are former. We brought that energy into today's episode that features discussions surrounding this summer’s Goop Cruise, the frustration with exclusive drops and early access emails, Ladcore Summer™.
Here’s everything you need for this week’s episode.
A Goop Cruise? Really?
I think it’s fair to say that cruises aren’t for everyone.
Especially Goop customers.
But this week, we discovered that Goop is doing a European cruise this summer. While I know you’re scrambling to get your reservation now, I’m going to make you read their description of it before I provide a link.
Prepare for the ultimate getaway. Guests of The Retreat will have the opportunity to experience goop at Sea, an exclusive wellness journey curated by goop. goop’s founder and CEO, Gwyneth Paltrow and some of goop’s favorite practitioners will host interactive sessions to enhance your mind, body and soul. Plus, you’ll receive a variety of wellness-focused perks and surprises throughout your cruise. Space is limited, so book now to reserve your spot.
Okay, here it is.
I know Gwyneth doesn’t drink much these days, but imagining her with a well frozen rum drink dancing in a Hawaiian to a cheesy cruise bend… well, it almost makes me want to entertain it.
(No, it doesn’t.)
To round out this portion of the show, we shut things down by going through a few gifts from the Goop Father’s Day gift guide that features cutting boards ($420), virtual chocolate tastings ($1,100), and wellness retreats ($3,600 per night). Okay.
Just let us give you our money.
There’s nothing more frustrating than missing out on a highly-coveted item you’ve been buying. Whether you took a night off from drinking the week before to afford it or you simply have no control over your personal finances, there’s no high like that of making it through checkout; no low like that of seeing “Sold Out” when you log on.
This week, three companies made it just a liiiiittle bit more annoying to buy their products. Okay, a lot more annoying.
Aime Leon Dore — When even the “Early Access” email list can’t get things, there seems to be an issue.
Louis Vuitton — Want some Louis Vuitton x Nike Air Force 1s? Well, you better hope you have a $1+ million spending history with them to even get offered some.
Chanel — They’re opening private stores for top clients so have fun waiting in line at the mall, loser.
Endless Ladcore Summer™
Being a World Cup year, everyone’s soccer interest seems to be 👀 lately.
Enter: Balenciaga.
I mean, it’s essentially a Manchester United x Liverpool jersey which is a mega tough scene for literally anyone who knows. That being said, we’re not shying away from embracing Ladcore Summer™ in all its glory — even if it means getting headbutted by a member of Oasis or Rúben Dias’s dad.
As always, we closed things out with our wishlists.
Apologies for any broken links below — a lot of these products are now from older seasons or have since sold out, so our link situation will remain in flux.
Will’s Wishlist
Vintage Side Tables
Barrett’s Wishlist
Food52 Working Glasses — New
To listen to this week’s episode of Retail Therapy in its entirety, look no further than Apple Podcasts and Spotify. Or, if you’d like to watch it, look no further than YouTube.
Feedback? Compliments? Comments? Concerns? We’d love to hear your thoughts on this week’s episode.